The origin of the blog (2019)
Welcome to this much-loved and cared-for space of mine, which was born at the beginning of 2019 expressly as a blog (the inner woman). I was writing then under a pseudonym (GaGa Oz), with a certain fear and a lot of modesty, but out of a powerful need to express myself as freely as possible to express my understandings, difficulties, pains and joys. Also to have my ideas and visions recorded and at hand, leaving behind notebooks with my notes and writings, which were already too many after so many years of creative writing behind me.
GaGa Oz: An act of individuation
After four years on the road, I dared to show my name, a way to bring my vulnerability , although I see that the alias feels closer to me than my official name; respecting it deeply, as it is been given to me by my lineages of origin, with the pseudonym I have named myself, a powerful exercise of individuation and self-affirmation.
Therapeutic vocation and the body as a tool
At the beginning of 2023 I felt that the blog could also accommodate my vocation as a companion through gestalt therapy and also show other therapeutic resources that I am integrating in my path and that I use to others and to know myself better. Among them, I place special value on the ways that lead me to experience myself through the body, especially dancing (5Rhythms, Ecstatic Dance, Butoh, ATS, Tribal Fusion), physical yoga (hatha and yin yoga) and bioenergetics.
I have been marked along the way by my family, love, fear, my grief, my need to belong, my relationship with sexuality and creativity, the longing for freedom, the search for a tribe and the creation of a community. All of this permeates my personal and professional journey and runs through it in a transversal way.
Writing as a connection to the subtle
In the blog I write about what happens to me, what motivates or worries me, what drags me, what I discover, what I dream about. Often I do it driven by an impulse that I feel is alien to me, as if I were not in control, nor did I choose the subject or the words. Rather, I listen to a signal, to a intuition, I am confronted by a powerful vision that presents itself as a flash of impact that I need to register first, to perhaps decipher later the profound meaning that it brings me and that remains veiled at the outset.
This perceptive-intuitive experience has been with me since I was a child and I have tended to judge it and even to repress it, branding myself as a fantasist, an inventor, an impostor. Now I feel it as an expression of my inner voice, one who speaks to me from subtle territories and gives me valuable clues, opens doors, encourages and inspires me. She is the one who knows, the internal woman who gives her name to this space.
So I write because it feels good, because I like it, because it helps me to clarify myself, because I need it, because it helps me to look at myself and to look further and deeper. I write to show myself, even if hardly anyone sees me or reads me, and also to prove something to myself. Maybe that I can, that I want to, that I have something to say, that I am worthy, that I can do it even without any goals or expectations. Because writing is part of who I am.
I write because writing has always been a way of creative development for me, a way to express my Self and to connect with something above me that guides my steps, especially when I feel lost.
Gratitude
This virtual space in which I write is a corner of my inner home from where I seek to unfold my light and release my shadow. That's why I appreciate your gracious entry.
«Thank you for your presence.»
Gloria García Ordóñez - GaGa Oz